Lately, I have been noticing that many people find living in denial, easier and more comfortable than being in acceptance. The problem with denial is it keeps you stuck in the same holding pattern that you have been experiencing for years. So the the only way to change; is to gain awareness around the thing that you have been denying, accept it, and then take action to change the pattern. This is much easier to said than done, I am totally aware of that. So today I will just give you tips on ways to bring more acceptance into your life so that we can build this muscle for you:
1) Stop denying what you are feeling
We have been primed by society to always keep on a happy face and to never show sadness or weakness. I am here to tell you that this way of relating to others is killing you. By repressing what you are actually feeling you are creating more stress and pain for yourself. If you acknowledge and accept exactly how you are feeling in this moment you will not have to process the same issue again because it will not be added to the proverbial pile of stuff that you have averted from dealing with. When you stuff your feelings it adds to all the other things that we have avoided dealing with, which makes for more suffering, grief and loss when you encounter another experience that is similar. And believe me the universe will present the same instance in a newly packaged form, I promise. Do have the willingness to face it ?
2)Practice Letting Go
Instead of holding onto the issue or avoiding it. Try walking through the feeling, issue or situation. When you choose to take the time to experience what you are feeling in the moment you are treating yourself with mercy and compassion. To do this, listen to your feeling, breathe with it and treat it like a small child who is having a hard time. Cry, shout or scream if you need to. Make artwork or journal about it so that you are externalizing the issue at hand, then you will no longer ruminate about it. Release the feeling so that you are letting go.
3) Be Kind to yourself
Leave the judge at out of this process. It is not helpful to tell yourself that you shouldn’t be feeling this way or why am I still feeling this way. Leave this thinking at the door. Practice positive self parenting. I know it sounds stupid, but talking to yourself kindly and allowing yourself to be where you are will give you a better self concept and build self acceptance.
I know that this sounds like a lot. Especially if you come from a home where you were taught to not feel what you were feeling or that your reality was not valid. This is a practice. And with any practice it takes time and effort. Let me know your thoughts about this topic below. Please let me know how I can help you in your process of transforming your life. Until next week. Be kind, loving and practice mercy.
CelineImage: Mighty Key by greeblehaus