Life is one big transition. ~Willie Stargell
Transition and change are the one constant in our lives. Things come and go. The only thing we can do about life is to embrace where we are today, instead of urning for the past. Transition is difficult because it makes us re write the story that we tell ourselves. As humans we try to find patterns to make meaning in life. When that security of understanding is taken away it can create loss in a person’s life.
Here are five ways to reframe difficult transitions:
1) See that this is a part of the path of your life
When we urn for the past we create suffering. The more that we resist change the more it creates pain. When we grasp to past situations, relationships, we keep ourselves stuck.
When we transform our thinking and see that every transition is a stepping stone in our path, we can find peace and surrender to the reality of what is. When we can see things that are difficult with eyes of compassion, joy and understanding we thrive through difficult times.
Try this affirmation on for size: I embrace my life and see it with gratitude, acceptance and joy.
You may not believe this affirmation at first, but if “we fake it till we make it” we can change our thinking. The more that you practice affirmations and positive beliefs the easier it will become.
2) Use self care to help you
Most of the time when are are in transition we forget to take care of ourselves. We are so focused on the situation at hand that we forget that we need to be kind and take care of our body, mind and spirit. Continuing to care for ourselves is necessary for us to thrive through a challenging period.
Here are a few self care suggestions:
Saying no to things that deplete our energy
Listen to soothing music
Not engaging with people who trigger us or do not feel supportive
3) Reaching out to your support network
They say it takes a village… well that is true. As humans we are wired for connection. We are the only mammals that are born not ready to fend for ourselves, we are dependent on our care givers. Into adult hood we still need to be connected with others. Our need for community never goes away, we are creatures that are wired for connection.
Reach out to your support network, be vulnerable, ask for support and help you, do not have to go through this transition alone. Don’t loose faith, it will get better, there is a plan you just have to let it unfold. If you believe in a higher power as for help from it. Turn over your worries, so they will not have power over you.
4) Be kind to yourself
When one is having a difficulty in their own life you may catch yourself saying. But I shouldn’t feel this way or why do I feel this way, I should be stronger. These are all lies. You are allowed to have any feelings that you want to. They are valid and they need to be given a place to be heard and accepted so that they can be let go.
Practicing self compassion and kindness is necessary for growth. When going through transition one may be more sensitive. Treat yourself like a fragile flower. You need, water, food, sunlight and oxygen. When you feel yourself wilting, ask yourself if you are hungry, angry, lonely or tired? If it is one of these things you have a solution. You must HALT! When you are hungry, feed yourself something nourishing. When you are angry, write about it or make art work about it. When your are lonely, reach out and talk to someone. When you are tired, take a nap!!!
Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything. ~George Bernard Shaw
5) Reframe this transition as an adventure
When we can reframe things that are stressful or scary we take the power out of them. We get a chance to have a different experience. If you are preparing from something stressful remind yourself that you get to do that thing not that you have to do something. When we can see things through the eyes of wonder and curiosity we can have a much more pleasant and rewarding existence. It is all our choice. Remember life if one big transition, and that transition is one big adventure. We get to be blessed by interesting experiences and get to learn lessons from them.
Use the image of the butterfly as inspiration when going through a transition. It goes through 4 different stages before it becomes its actualized self. Transition leads to transformation which completes the metamorphosis into the being that you were destined to be. In a lifetime we sometimes go through several metamorphosis’.
You can’t stop the waves but you can learn to surf ~ John Kabat-Zin
I hope that this post helps you to embrace transition. Please leave comments below and feel free to contact me if you have any questions firstname.lastname@example.org or 323.515.2278. IF you need help with stress reduction and acceptance of your current situation. I am having a workshop on stress reduction on Wednesday. Here is more info:
Have a blessed week.