What keeping commitments teaches us

In Blog by Celine RedfieldLeave a Comment

commitmentWhen you’re surrounded by people who share a passionate commitment around a common purpose, anything is possible.
~Howard Schultz

Usually people who have trouble with committing have fear that they will make a bad choice. This pattern leads them to live in avoidance of decision making. This is a difficult way to experience your  life and can keep you stuck in a holding pattern of confusion and unease.  A person’s level of commitment to something shows how committed they are to the path that they are on. Do you want to start being able to commit to yourself and others? Here are five ways that making decisions and commitments can improve your life:

1) Commitment teaches follow through and how to keep our word.

When we are impeccable with our words, we learn to not say YES immediately. When we learn to pause and consider what agreement we are entering into, we develop the ability of choice. For each agreement we participate in shows us something about ourselves. Learning to say maybe or let me get back to you, is a helpful tool for learning how to make lasting commitments. By pausing we can learn to be less impulsive by using care and respect for other’s time.

When you practice pausing, you can connect with your higher self, instead of fear. If you’re having difficulty making decisions, try this exercise: Focus on your breath for two minutes. Then take 5 diaphragmatic breaths while pressing this acupressure point GB24 Sun and Moon. It is one hand width below your nipple.


2)Making commitments helps to build your self confidence, and teaches you how to show up for yourself.

Learning to stick with what you say is important to living a life with integrity, and making commitments and sticking with them is important  to helping build confidence in every area of one’s life. When you see your word as a bond between two people instead of just a thing to please others, you tend to be more mindful of what you choose to say. Many people say yes to things for fear of people not liking them. The irony is if you continually say yes and then flake on people, they tend to not trust you, and you end up not being liked. It becomes a self fulling prophecy. 

Most people say yes or don’t make decisions because of fear. Listening to fear keeps you stuck in the status quo. Today try to be willing to have a new experience, and know that you are capable of making good decisions and that the universe is presenting you with opportunities to be on the path that is for your highest good.

The more you practice making decisions, the easier it becomes. The more that you are capable of making choices, the better your self concept becomes because you are actively participating in your life.

3) Keeping commitments builds community.

When we are able to show up for our friends and family, we have opened ourselves up to the possibility of having support and giving support. When we show up to events that we say we are going to, we make allies that then want to support us.

We are social beings. If your tendency is to isolate, then it is important that you begin to build community around you by participating in volunteering, taking up a hobby, or being a part of a class or a team.  Many people feel isolated and alone in this world because they lack meaningful connections to others. I understand that creating new relationships with others is a risk, but it is necessary to your wellbeing.

4) Commitments create and build trust with others.

When we are actively interacting with others and showing up, we are building bonds and practicing being a trustworthy person. The first way to build trust with others is by saying what we mean. By keeping commitments, we begin to build trust that can lead to intimate relationships. Keeping commitments shows others that they can count on us being there for them when they need us.

5) Creating a pattern of commitment builds respect for self.

When we respect our ability to make decisions and are willing to take risks we build trust, respect, and self confidence. Each time we follow through on a commitment we open ourselves to more possibilities in our lives. When we say no or don’t follow through, we tend to experience regret. Usually what blocks us to committing is fear.

You may be saying:  “But I am scared to make a bad decision. It is just better for me to do nothing.” Remember we are all human, if you make an uninformed choice, then it has been a great learning lesson of what not to do next time. Everything in our lives teaches us what works for us and what does not. Try viewing decisions this way, so there is less judgement and fear attached to them.

Try this affirmation on for size: ” I am capable of making decisions that serve my highest good. I participate in my life.”

Desire is the key to motivation, but it’s the determination and commitment to unrelenting pursuit of your goal – a commitment to excellence – that will enable you to attain the success you seek.~Mario Andretti

Try these tools this week. And as always you can contact me celine@innergrowththerapy.com if you have any questions. I hope that you have a blessed week.



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